Journey

I am very "surface level" when it comes to this blog. I believe it is because I never wanted it to feel to much like a diary. Just a way that I could document my life. Share photos and art. Sometimes it feels like lying because I leave out most of the turmoil in my life. We all do that though. We make like sunshine and rainbows when really we are standing under a rain cloud. I have been keeping to myself alot this week, trying to deal with things in my life. Trying to make decisions.....Trying to reason. I know I am down. I accept it. Sometimes you need to close the shutters and go inside. I am not ready to open them yet, but I did stumble across an amazing poem this morning referred from Gypsy Girl Guide Blog. Thank you Gypsy girl for giving me the words I did not know how to say.

The Journey

by Mary Oliver

One day you finally knew what you had to do,

and began, though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice—

though the whole house began to tremble and you felt the old tug at your ankles.

"Mend my life!"each voice cried. But you didn't stop.

You knew what you had to do,

though the wind pried with its stiff fingers at the very foundations,

though their melancholy was terrible.

It was already late enough, and a wild night,

and the road full of fallen branches and stones.

But little by little, as you left their voices behind,

the stars began to burn through the sheets of clouds,

and there was a new voice which you slowly recognized as your own,

that kept you company as you strode deeper and deeper into the world,

determined to do the only thing you could do—

determined to save the only life you could save.

~

I know that I am on a journey. I know that I do not have all the answers yet and that it is alright not to. I also know that the answers will never come if I stray from who I am and never stop to listen to myself.